Mom yelled at me today. And by yelled at, I mean we both fought and we probably both said things we didn't mean.
I understand why. She was angry I didn't think something I did was important enough. She was mad I was trying to be responsible (by not celebrating finally doing something right in my life in order to save money) and she was mad that I was okay with something Naomi did. She thinks Naomi treated me like shit. But I don't think she did; Or if she did, I don't blame her. Which is odd for me. Who knew my old ADHD medicine gave me self-esteem? Apparently, I need to start taking it again, screw these new meds..
I think she was also mad because I've been such a horrible bitch lately. I'd like to say that- since I know I'm doing it- I'll stop. But I won't. My anxiety has sky rocketed in the last month and with I have become a bundle of easily set off traps and explosions. And she is the person I spend the most time with, so I snap at her the most.
It just occurred to me that, while I have been thinking that the sooner I move in with Jeremy the sooner things will get better with my mom, I will probably end up alienating him too. If I don't fix this mess I'll end up just alienating everyone, probably.
And that's certainly not good.. O.O
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